"All You Zombies"

“All You Zombies” - written by David Malcolm © 2013 David Malcolm

In junior high, I was aware of the Malcolm brothers, but never actually met them back then. There was an age and social distance, given that they were high schoolers, and I was a king hell nerd. However, I knew of them as musicians and had heard of The Bottled Goblins, John’s band, and certainly one of The Coolest Band Names Ever. Fast forward several decades (!) later, and my brother and I both put in guest appearances on recordings by Eljer P. Sloan, David Malcolm’s ongoing music project. EPS is David’s spirit of generosity writ large. The songs and vocals (and guitars, and…) are David’s but the musicians he brings together are free to bring their own thang, their own flavor to the arrangements. It is with David and EPS that I took part in one of the art projects I am Most Proud of in My Life: the “St. Zombie” song/recording/book/video (IYKYK… OK?).

When it comes to covering songs, everyone (writers, musicians, punters) pretty much agrees that there are three options: 1) don’t… just don’t, 2) be totally, slavishly faithful to the original, and 3) fuck it up, bro… make it your own. Hendrix OWNED “All Along the Watchtower.” Sinéad O'Connor and Chris Cornell brought themselves to “Nothing Compares 2 U.” With “All You Zombies” I truly felt that David had a Perfect Arrangement. What was a poor boy to do? Well. Run the song through a filter of Pink Floyd’s Wish You Were Here and Planet P Project’s Planet P, of course. The synth lines on “Welcome to the Machine” and “Have a Cigar” are some of the first things kid me tried to learn on my little Casio MT-35. Bring it. Tony Carey ripping synths, drums machines, and vocoder on Planet P? Domo arigato, Mister Carey. In fact, I could NOT pull off David’s “Can I interest you in another cup of coffee?" successfully, so I let the ghosting vocoder do the “you” lift. Also, there is a recording of coffee brewing in the background…